A husband visited a marriage counselor and
said, “When we were first married, I would come home from the office, my wife
would bring my slippers and our cute little dog would run around barking.
Now after ten years it’s all different, I come home, the dog brings the slippers and
my wife runs around barking.” “Why complain?“ said the counselor.
“You’re still getting the same service!”.
WOMEN:
– Women are honest, loyal, and forgiving. They are smart, knowing that knowledge is power. But they still know how to use their softer side to make a point.
– Women want to be the best for their family, their friends, and themselves.
– Their hearts break when a friend dies. They have sorrow at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
– A woman can make a romantic evening unforgettable.
– Women come in all sizes, in all colours and shapes. They live in homes, apartments and cabins. They drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.
– The heart of a woman is what makes the world spin! Women do more than just give birth. They bring joy and hope. They give compassion and ideals.
– They give moral support to their family and friends. And all they want back is a hug, a smile and for you to do the same to people you come in contact with.
MEN:
– Men are good at lifting heavy stuff and sometimes killing spiders.
How do these people seek a wife?
BUILDER
Wanted a wife to help build upon the foundations of my life. Must be homely and willing to build relationship from the ground up.
DOCTOR
I am looking for a wife to cure the emptiness in my life. However if you feel the need for a second opinion then it’s fine by me.
ARMY COMMANDO
My mission in life is to find myself the perfect wife. Successful applicants must be able to use a penknife and a compass. She who dares wins. Camouflage provided.
RACE CAR DRIVER
A model wife required to fit in with my fast track life. Must be able to keep pace!
ASTRONAUT
I’m searching for a wife to fill the space in my life. Someone to share my universe. Must have looks that are out of this world!
The wife makes dinner and serves it on paper plates.
The husband asks, “Why don’t you serve it on real plates?”
Wife: Because I do the dishes.
Husband: So? It’s your job.
Wife: And you do the trash.
Q: What’s the smartest thing a husband can say?
A: “My wife says…”
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