Funny Messages

Jokes



Three convicts were on the way to prison. They were each allowed to take one item with them to help them occupy their time while incarcerated.

On the bus, one turned to another and said, “So, what did you bring?” The second convict pulled out a box of paints and stated that he intended to paint anything he could. He wanted to become the “Grandma Moses of Jail”.

Then he asked the first, “What did you bring?”

The first convict pulled out a deck of cards and grinned and said, “I brought cards. I can play poker, solitaire and gin, and any number of games.”

The third convict, a blonde man, was sitting quietly aside, grinning to himself. The other two took notice and asked, “Why are you so smug? What did you bring?”

The guy pulled out a box of tampons and smiled. He said “I brought these.”

The other two were puzzled and asked – “What can you do with those?”

He grinned and pointed to the box and said – “Well according to the box, I can go horseback riding, swimming, roller-skating …”


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Jokes



Energizer Bunny arrested; charged with battery.


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Jokes



A father of five won a toy in a game. When he got home, he called all the children together to determine which one got the toy. “Okay, who’s the most obedient? Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?” he asked. All five small voices responded to him in unison, “You, Daddy!”.


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Jokes



It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial cost and blamed it on the cost of living.


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Cool SMS



If there is some work which
you think you are not able to finish,

imagine every day for few minutes
that you have successfully finished the work..


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